do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
