Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
