escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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