scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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