She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
This baby is an asshole
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
