dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
