porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
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