its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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