do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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