margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
