Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Also, beer. Big fan.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
