does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Sext me about skeletons
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
