It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
you would pick up someone in the library
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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