my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
