A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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