32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
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stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
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He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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