lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I just blew my weed a kiss
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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