Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
