My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
