Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
