My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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