ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize