what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize