i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
