so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
