the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
