You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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