This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
