OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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