I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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