dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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