it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Randomize
