this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
