I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
