All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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