I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
