he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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