I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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