Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
