Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
