it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize