why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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