just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
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