what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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