My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She told me I should be a condom model.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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