She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
They have beer where we have blood.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
