I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
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I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
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I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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