this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You may now shotgun with the bride
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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