just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
