Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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